Serena Malcolm

Who am I when I close my eyes
and slip to a world of paradise?

I am not the she you see by day
when desire’s dream has ebbed away,
Engulfed in flames of sin I lay,
Forgiveness from my God I pray.

A wretched soul that claws the wall,
At Redemption’s door my footsteps stall,
I know he hears my doleful call,
Yet on deaf and ruthless ears it falls.

And this is what I live and breathe,
This is the life I chose to lead,
Where friends and family all take heed,
For none wish to be the conscious Me,
They pour their pity through the open wound
left by seeded and conceited womb,
I made a choice and chose too soon;
A life for a life with mine entombed,
Blessing and curse epitomised,
His joy my joy his cries my cries.

So who am I when I close my eyes?
Alternate Me who’s free from ties,
And the liberty is just so sweet,
And the conscience needn’t ever creep,
And the spirit never needs to weep
for the Me I am when I go to sleep.